


New Guy

by commanderlurker (honeybee592)



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Developing Relationship, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-17
Updated: 2018-02-17
Packaged: 2019-03-19 16:36:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13708374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/honeybee592/pseuds/commanderlurker
Summary: Being the new guy on an old crew isn't easy, but James finds his way.





	New Guy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [worstcommander](https://archiveofourown.org/users/worstcommander/gifts).



Being the new guy fucking sucks. Leaves James feeling like he’s playing catch up half the time and man is he tired from all this running.

Right from the start, right from first stepping onto the Normandy with Major Alenko, Reapers nipping at their heels, he knew he was stepping into an established clique. Shepard and Alenko’s familiarity with the ship, their casual attitude with Moreau, even the clearly complicated history between Shepard and Alenko themselves told James that he was on the outside. Esteban was a nice surprise, but even he had been on the ship longer than James, enlisted to help with the retrofit. James had pretty much stumbled on.

Only gets worse when they pick up Doc, Scars, Sparks.

They’ve all got their injokes, their memories of the good old days, and shit does Scars like to rub that in. James knows he’s not doing himself any favours there by baiting him, but he just wants to be one of the cool kids, too. That’s not so much to ask, right?

He still feels new now, months after living on the Normandy and fighting alongside Shepard. Always fighting alongside Shepard. She takes James on every mission. Maybe that’s why he’s so fucking tired. He’s loving every minute of it, but shit, does she ever take a break? Is this what being N7’s gonna be like? Took him a while to understand and appreciate Shepard’s style, how she clicks, why she does shit the way she does. That was just another example of James being the new guy. Shepard’s been N7 for years. Been a commander for years. Has all that leadership shit down. James’d only had one command position and even that was only because his CO got taken out by the Collectors.

And when he gets that N track commendation? Well, he just looks at Commander Shepard and turtles up. How can he compare with her?

Shepard’s not the only one he compares himself to. The ship’s full of stars, galactic heroes in their own rights. Scars, Doc, Sparks, even Joker and Chakwas. But James takes all of them in his stride. They’re good, sure, great even, but they’re not Shepard. And they’re not Alenko.

Yeah. That guy. He’s definitely part shark and by the time you see the fin, it’s too late, you may as well be dead already. He’s one of the only people on the Normandy who has the guts question Shepard, and he does it right in front of everyone else. Dude’s got ablative covered balls. It’s clear him and Shepard have history. James can’t quite put the puzzle together, but he figures out they first served together during that first shakedown mission. But Scars, Doc, Sparks, they all served with Shepard during that mission too, they’ve all got history, but there’s something about Shepard and Alenko.

When he finds out the truth, he’s devastated. Together? Like, a couple? Shepard wouldn’t. She wouldn’t break regs like that, no fucking way. But it’s true. He asks Shepard one day, in a roundabout way, when she’s doing her rounds. They’re down in the cargo bay. James’ just cleaning up his armour after the last mission.

“You jealous, James?” She folds her arms and smirks. Stops smirking when James says she should know better than to fraternise with a subordinate. (Well, Alenko’s a major, so technically he’s ranked higher than Shepard, but Shepard’s his CO--it’s complicated--but the principal is the same.) Doesn’t help that he is a little jealous. She asks him to dance and neither of hold back. Even giving his all isn’t enough and James is left on his ass nursing a broken nose. That’ll teach him not to stick it where it’s not wanted.

Nothing changes though. Not really. Next day the Normandy arrives at Cyone and Shepard’s telling him to suit up. He thought she’d ground him as punishment, but no, there he is, suiting up with her and Alenko.

The three of them fight their way through husks and brutes the same as always. Shepard’s voice isn’t any more clipped than usual and if Alenko knows what James said, he doesn’t act like it. When the time comes, James provides cover for Alenko while Alenko does his nerd thing on a console. Shepard’s a green dot on the periphery of his HUD, providing more overarching cover. Reactors back up and running, Shepard calls Cortez and orders the extraction. Job done. Mostly. There’s an enemy encounter on their way back to the LZ, but nothing the three of them can’t handle. They’re a good team.

On the shuttle ride back, James looks at Shepard and Alenko. Nothing about their body language gives them away. They’re a good team. The two of them. The three of them. His heart lurches.

Nothing changes. James still goes on every mission with Shepard and Alenko. He’s still tired. He still forces himself to do all his reps in his makeshift gym. He’s pummelling a punching bag, thinking about the last time he ate real chicken when Alenko corners him one afternoon-cycle. James almost yelps from the fright but manages to turn it into a sweet move instead.

“Major,” he says. He’s not gonna stop what he’s doing, even though he was only a couple of minutes from finishing; his muscles burn and ache.

“Lieutenant,” Alenko says. He doesn’t say anything else. Just stands there, arms folded, face blank. Does he know? Is he pissed? Is he waiting for James to be completely fucked from his workout so he’s got the advantage? No, not that. He could biotically smash James easily enough. Whatever it is, James doesn’t like it. His stomach turns and his blood fizzes. He finishes his routine, then shakes out his arms, wipes his face on his sweaty tee. When he pulls his tee down, he catches Alenko staring. Or does he? Alenko’s eyes flick up to James’, anyway. He throws the thought away, then he picks it up again.

“You come down here just to look?” James asks. He flexes deliberately, playfully.

Alenko smirks. Actually smirks. “That’s an added bonus. But no, I came to check in.”

“Thought that was Lola’s job.”

“She’s… delegating.”

Something in Alenko’s voice trips James and he drops his joke. “She okay?”

Alenko glances away and puffs out a sigh. “Yeah. Just tired. She needs a decent sleep.”

“Who doesn’t?”

Alenko smiles. “But I didn’t come down here to talk about her. I wanted to see how you’re doing.”

He seems genuine, but James can’t shake the feeling that he’s only here because Shepard sent him. “I’m good. No complaints.”

“You sure?”

“Uh huh.”

“Okay then. Nice chat.” Alenko makes to turn, but he stops, holds James’ eye. “We didn’t have the best introduction, you and me, I mean. But... we’re good now, right?”

James’ memory flashes back to Earth and the Reapers, and Alenko taking point on the way to the Normandy while James struggled to keep himself together. Then Mars, with Alenko and Shepard at each other’s throats, and James being ordered back to the shuttle when Doc crawled out of a vent for a happy little reunion that James wasn’t invited to. James’ daring stunt (life saving _and_ death defying) with the shuttle that didn’t do Alenko any good. Then Udina and the ultimate Shepard verses Alenko showdown. Yeah, not the best introduction. But since then? He’s making a name for himself at the side of Shepard and Alenko, both in the field and on the poker table.

“Yeah, we’re good.”

Alenko nods once. “Good. You’re… you’re a good man, Vega.” With that, Alenko leaves.

A good man? What the hell does that mean? Was he… flirting? Or just giving positive feedback? Because if that was his positive feedback, then James has no idea how he’s earned a reputation as a badass biotics teacher. And if that was him flirting, then…

James tries and fails to keep Alenko’s chat, pep talk, whatever, in the back of his mind for the rest of the afternoon. He still thinks its weird. He considers talking Esteban through it but Esteban already knows that James’ got a crush on Shepard and will probably think he’s just jealous. He used to be, and he still is, but he isn’t, too. He doesn’t know what he is. Shepard doesn’t make an appearance at dinner, but Alenko comes down and fills up plates for two before retreating. That’s the only indication in all these months that their relationship might be more than just professional.

Shepard’s tired. Quiet. Still professional, sure, still leading the crew, leading the missions, getting briefs from Hackett, fighting Reapers on foot, fighting threshmaws on foot, you know, the usual, but she’s tired. James likes to think he’s the only one who can see it so he gives her armour extra attention when he’s cleaning them all after missions, nudges her shoulder when they’re in the shuttle, tells her rude jokes, flirts, anything he can think of. Of course, Alenko knows she’s suffering too. He’s attentive like that. But James also sees how tired Alenko’s getting. Maybe he’s tired from all this running, too, from propping up Shepard, keeping her alive. So James starts giving Alenko’s armour extra attention too, puts orders in with Esteban to make sure the Normandy’s stocked with his favourite energy bars. When the Normandy docks on the Citadel for maintenance and requisition handling, James goes on a mission to find the whiskey Alenko likes.

He’s haggling with a shifty Salarian trader over the price of the whiskey when his omni pings with an incoming call. It’s Shepard. He puts his hand up to the Salarian and steps away to answer, his heart hammering.

“Hey, Lola,” he says.

“James, hey. Listen, Normandy’s going to be out of action for twenty-eight hours so I’m giving everyone leave.”

“Sweet.” Is she calling everyone to tell them the good news? Or just James?

“Yeah, you got plans?”

The Salarian’s making are-you-gonna-buy-this-or-not gestures. James glares at him and steps forward, waving his omni over the pay pad before snatching the bottle. “Nah, maybe just Purgatory, get the gossip, play a few hands. Probably bunk back on the Normandy.” He’s been thinking of a tattoo, too. Something to acknowledge his invite to the Villa.

“Want to do all that with me and Kaidan in a fancy apartment?”

James’ mouth goes dry. His heart’s beating even harder now. Stay cool, Vega, stay cool. “Sounds good. Who else you got coming?” Please let this be a private party, _please_ …

“It’s pretty exclusive,” Shepard says. James can hear the smile in her voice. “I’ll ping you the co-ords. See you soon.”

They disconnect and sure enough, an address pops up on his omni. The address is in the Bachjret Ward. Fancy. James’ never been over there. By the time he’s arrived, his hands are so sweaty the overpriced bottle of whiskey almost slides out of his grip.

He’s buzzed in.

Holy hell, what an apartment. Two levels, with mezzanine, huge open spaces, floor to ceiling windows with views right across the Citadel. He whistles his appreciation, then his eyes catch Shepard, standing up on the mezzanine. She’s wearing an N7 hoodie and black sweatpants. Bare feet. Her hair’s down. She waves him in with a big grin. James raises the whiskey in greeting, butterflies fluttering in his chest. Alenko follows, dressed equally casual, only instead of a N7 hoodie, he’s wearing a plaid button down. He’s never looked more Canadian. The two of them pad down the stairs.

“Hola,” James says. “Got you a little something.” He hands the whiskey to Alenko.

“Wow, James, how much did you pay for this?”

James shrugs, his face heating up, and makes up a number that’s considerably less than what he actually paid. Alenko says thanks again, then heads towards the kitchen.

“So, what’s the reason for this exclusive party?” James asks.

“Got to take advantage of downtime while we have it,” Shepard says.

“The Reapers don’t stop for downtime.” He regrets the words as soon as they’re out.

Shepard’s smile falters. “Sometimes you’ve got to know when to hit pause, even if no one else can.”

Yeah, he’s learning that.

He follows Shepard into the kitchen. Alenko’s started cooking. Smells damn good. He spots the ingredients laid out on the bench. Fresh vegetables, various dried herbs and spices. Steak. Three of them. They must have paid as much as James had for all this food. His mouth waters. Shepard elbows him. The touch is electric. He turns to see if it was an accident. She holds out a bottle of beer. The three of them clink and says cheers. James is so happy he could cry.

They eat and talk, laughing as they recount the details of their various missions. The time Shepard put James in charge of debugging a terminal and James just kicked it until it worked. The time Alenko scraped his boot along the floor of the Ardat-Yakshi monastery and almost made Shepard and James shit themselves from the fright. The time James threw a frag grenade at a brute and how all three of them had to be hosed off in the cargo bay before they were allowed back in the ship proper.

There’s no mention about why he’s the only guest at this party and James’ isn’t about to ask.

After dinner, James does the dishes. That just means chucking everything in the dishwasher and scrubbing the pan in the sink. Shepard dries up. Alenko gets more beers.

They sit in the lounge, talking shit a while longer, big fake fire burning on the wall, grand piano in the corner. Shit, this is the fanciest place James has ever seen. Is it Shepard’s? Alenko’s? Is… is this their love nest? Their retirement plan? Whatever this place is, it feels good, sharing the space together. They sit close, knees almost touching, like they do on the Normandy, as if all this space is too much. It’s good. Better than good. As the beer works its way into James brain, he starts conjuring fantasies of a threesome but he blinks them away as soon as they arrive. He can’t be thinking of his superiors like that, no way. Can’t help it though. Conditions are perfect…

Alenko breaks out the whiskey. James just has a single, claiming he’s already buzzed enough. Truth is, he hates whiskey, but he wants to taste it on Shepard’s tongue. On Alenko’s… Okay, enough of that.

The drinking and talking carries on. James learns that Kaidan’s an only child and has family on Earth. He learns that Shepard’s mom is serving on Hackett’s flagship, that she’s a military brat.Turns out the apartment belongs to Anderson and with him on Earth… well. Someone may as well get some use out of it. Anderson and Shepard go way back, right to N school. Kaidan and Shepard don’t go back too far, but in their short time together, their relationship was the least serious of all the regs they broke (ship stealing has to be at the top of that list). Shepard tells him Anderson had wrangled James’ transfer to the Normandy a day before the Reapers hit. Dumb luck that Kaidan happened to know _and_ be in the same corridor at the same time to make sure James got to his new assignment. He gulps at that one. He learns all this shit he never knew about them, all those details that make up a human life. He thought he knew everything there was to know about Shepard at least, he’d read her file, has followed her exploits for as long as he can remember. But here, now, drinking expensive whiskey that’s wasted on him, he learns just how much he doesn’t know.

Sometime deep into the night cycle they all start yawning, their glasses empty. Shepard makes noises about heading to bed and James wonders if this place has a spareroom. He distracts himself from more fantasies by clearing away the glasses and beer bottles. When he pokes his head around from the kitchen, Alenko’s halfway up the stairs and Shepard’s waiting at the bottom. His mind goes into overdrive.

“Still disappointed in me, James?” she asks.

“Huh?”

She tilts her head back, indicating Alenko, who’s now at the top of the stairs, leaning against the railing and looking down.

James’ face heats up, embarrassment acute. “Nah. Nah, I get it now. Still don’t know how you get away with it, but… you’re good together.” He offers a lame smile and resists the urge to fidget, then resists the urge to stand at rest.

“You wanna join us?” she asks.

“Uh…” James’ brain turns to scrambled eggs. All those fantasies rush forward and flood his vision. He blinks and Shepard’s still there, still smiling, looking a little embarrassed herself. Alenko’s still at the railing, watching. “Uh…” That’s all he’s got.

Shepard holds her hand out and James takes it automatically, follows her like he’s walking through a dream. At the top of the stairs, Alenko kisses Shepard briefly, then passes across and takes James’ other hand. The three of them walk like that into the master bedroom, Alenko toeing the door closed.

None of the elaborate threesome fantasies come true. They… don’t even have sex. They undress and pile into bed, Shepard in the middle, James and Alenko on either side and just… hold each other. James conforms himself to the curve of Lola’s back, not ashamed of his semi pressing against her, and drinks in her scent. He reaches over and lays a hand on Alenko...Kaidan...and strokes his skin. This...this feels right. Weird, but right. And he gets it, he does. He wasn’t lying. He’s seen what this war has taken out of Lola, out of Kaidan. He’s seen what she’s had to do, so yeah, he gets it. And now… they want to add James? He threads his fingers through Kaidan’s chest hair, rubs his nose against Lola’s neck. Yeah, he could do this, probably.

James wakes in the morning, mouth fuzzy, eyes groggy. He remembers where he is and expects shit to get awkward real fast. He takes in his surroundings. The other two are still asleep, breathing lightly. He checks the time. 0630. Normal for him, then. He stares at the ceiling a while and tries to process what’s happened. Nothing’s happened. Well, _something’s_ happened, but you know. Too wired to fall asleep again, he gets up and wanders downstairs to make coffee. He takes a peek in all the doors, checks out just what this apartment’s got going on. The place is huge. He can picture throwing a massive party here, but he’d take last night again if he could.

He carries three mugs of coffee upstairs and tries not to snort at Kaidan’s bed head. He fails. Kaidan’s glare has no heat. Lola rubs the sleep from her eyes and sits up. The three of them sit and drink, waking up at their own pace.

They don’t talk about how there’s three of them in the bed. Don’t talk about what it means or nothing. They take their time waking up, drinking their coffee. James can’t stop smiling and when he dares himself to glance at Lola and Kaidan, he sees them smiling too.

Both Lola and K have got shit to do up in the Presidium before they return to the Normandy. After breakfast (cooked by James. It’s the least he can do, after Kaidan’s dinner), the three of them head out. Lola’s hand lingers over the door pad. She looks sad. Like… like this might be the last time she does this. The three of them go their separate ways at rapid transport, Lola and K to the Presidium, James to the docks. He’s got a tattoo to get done.

Back on the Normandy, everything’s business as usual. James’ half expecting an invite to the captain’s cabin but it doesn’t come. Lola still takes him groundside. Alenko still takes meals up to the loft. James is starting to think he dreamed that whole leave, even asks Esteban what he got up to, in case he did end up at Purgatory and drank so much he blacked out. But no, the dinner, the sleepover, that was all real. Should he say something? What would he even say? Hey, Lola, so about that pyjama party we had…

There’s a group of them in the War Room, Lolarelaying the latest update from Hackett, Scars giving an update on Palevan, Sparks chipping in with details on whatever the Flotilla are up to. James just listens, arms folded. His eyes keep sliding over to Kaidan, to Lola. He’s not standing next to them. He wishes he was. His own fault for being late.

He’s just started over-analysing their latest interactions when Lola calls the meeting closed. “James, got a minute?” she says as everyone starts filing out.

“Sure.” She’s probably just gonna ask for input on the next mission but James can’t help getting his hopes up.

When only Lola, Kaidan, and James are left, she says, “You got plans later?”

Later, as in this night cycle, or… “I’m stuck on a flying cannonball, Lola. Not like I’m gonna head out to the beach or nothing.”

She grins. Kaidan smiles. “Bunk with us tonight?” Her face go pink when she asks. He’s so unused to seeing her embarassed, or unsure of herself. It’s kinda cute.

James grins so hard his cheeks ache. “Sure, sounds good.”

This time, they do have sex. It’s crazy. Not like, wild-crazy. No one ends up with bruises they’re gonna have to awkwardly explain away. More like, I-can’t-believe-this-is-actually-happening crazy. That tight squad dynamic from the field translates directly into a tight squad dynamic between the sheets. They kinda take up the same roles too, Lola hanging back, directing the action with subtle motions and short words. Kaidan and James following her lead, one eye on each other, the other on her. But James is still the new guy. He’s not had the years to learn what Lola and Kaidan like, what makes them moan and shiver, and it takes him ages to realise he doesn’t need to prove himself here. He’s earned his place already and this isn’t a test. When he calms down enough to just relax and slow down, to stop showing off, he picks up more and actually enjoys himself. And he’s not kicked out at the end. They snuggle down in a gross sweaty pile.

When he wakes up in the morning, he quietly slips out of bed, gets dressed, and slinks out of there. Only now, as he wills the elevator to be empty and the crew busy, does he consider the consequences of what he’s doing, _who_ he’s doing. Guilt sits heavy in his stomach as he scours himself clean in the showers, like he’s trying to wash off the memories.

Later in the morning-cycle, when Kaidan and Lola are up doing their own thing, it’s like nothing happened. No winks or knowing glances. Just the usual. These guys are pros at subterfuge. No wonder they’ve  managed to keep their relationship quiet for so long.

Kaidan corners James in the head later. “You know you can stay. Shepard’s shower is nicer than the crew showers.”

James takes his time washing his hands. “Yeah, I just, don’t want anyone seeing me doing the walk of shame, you know?”

“Why not?” He says it so matter of factly. Like it’s no big deal.

“Cause, you know, Shepard’s my CO and you’re her… partner? People’ll talk.”

“Let them.”

“Let them? Just like that?”

“Uh huh.”

James whistles.

Kaidan raises an eyebrow. “What? The galaxy’s falling apart. We’ve got to take what we can, when we can.”

“Didn’t take you to be so fatalist.”

Kaidan shrugs. “What I’ve been through, what _we’ve_ been through, it makes you see the world a little differently. I’m not the man I was when I first joined the Normandy. I’ve learned what to let go of, and what to hold tight.”

James swallows. He nods. Then he pulls Kaidan into a tight hug, leaning down to bury his face against his neck. He pushes Kaidan back just as quick, pats him on the shoulder, now painfully embarrassed. “Cool, yeah, thanks.”

Kaidan laughs. “Stay, next time.”

“Yeah, okay.”

He stays. People notice. But he’s James Vega so he can take the disapproval, the weird looks, the ribbing. Esteban expresses his concern, asks if James knows what he’s getting himself involved with, if he’s just setting himself up for heartbreak. He’s thought of that. He tries not to, but he can’t escape it. Chances are one of the three of them will get killed before they have a chance to break up. He tells Esteban that and Esteban looks like a husk has just wandered into the shuttle bay. He’ll come around.

The longer James stays, the more he takes on board. He’s sharing Lola’s burdens, lightning her workload. He sees just how much Kaidan’s already doing and wonders how they’ve kept going as long as they have. He thinks that when all this is over, he’ll fly through N school. Maybe not _fly_ , but he’s more prepared now than he was a couple months ago. He just has to survive long enough now. All three of them do.

By the time they’ve planted their boots on Earth again, he’s not the new guy anymore. He’s flown around the galaxy, been dropped into the hottest combat zones, chased and been chased, blown shit up and almost been blown up himself, and all at Lola and Kaidan’s side. He’s got a moment to himself at the FOB and he looks around, the destruction the Reapers have wrought, and a lump forms in his throat. He didn’t want to leave Earth, not at first, didn’t see the point of going to Mars when Earth was burning. Lola didn’t toss his ass when he gave her that backchat. Took him a while to appreciate that. She saw something in him, something other than his good looks. She took a chance on him. Kaidan took a chance on him.

Lola finishes up her chat with Anderson and wanders over, waving Kaidan over, too. The three of them knock their fists together, clank helmets.

Time to finish this, together.

**Author's Note:**

> And Shepard survives and they all live happily ever after the end.


End file.
